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13 Sep 08
Cry-a-a-a-ying (Orbison)
I've hesitated writing about this – mostly because it seems such a sensitive issue. On the other hand it relates to something that I've talked about before. In fact, I noticed very early on that it helped me to be open about these. Of course, talking about it doesn't mean writing about it on the net. But internet also means anonymityh, and perhaps I can even get some comments here that I wouldn't get if I talked about it with friends.

Since I decided to quit taking Zoloft some ten months ago, one thing has changed. I cry a lot nowadays. Now, people cry for several reasons. Not being happy is just one. But I'm as unhappy as I was before, no change there. I'm frustrated by my inability to love, to enjoy life. But it doesn't make me cry.

And I don't cry when small things don't go my way, as I did when I was a kid. I was what you'd call a crybaby, who would burst into tears when realizing he was wrong and everybody else right in Math class. It would be easy to think that the Zoloft period was just the crying faculty temporary disabled.

But no, it isn't like that at all. Nowadays, I cry when the Simpsons family reconciles at the end of an episode. I cry when hearing a woman on radio tell her life story. I cry when reading a column by Monica Ålgars in Hbl. I cried when I heard about Jokela. Simply put, serious or trivial doensn't matter – it can still move me to tears. I'm not ashamed of it, although on some occasions it can be a bit embarrasing, since crying is usually connected with some degree of despair. I'm not desperate, just strangely overwhelmed by emotion. What on earth has happened to me? Has the Zoloft really changed my brain? In that case, why didn't anyone tell me beforehand? Or is something else happening in my life – something that makes me more prone to crying and just correlated with me getting off the medication.
written by Mattias
Comments:
Jag tycker att man har lättare till tårarna när man blir äldre. Jag kan få tårar i ögonen av en FNB-notis.
posted by   Philip
Ge exempel på en FNB-notis! Aha, så tårarna återfår en roll i ens liv, efter att i tonåren blivit undanskuffade. Jag vet att vissa gamlingar kan börja gråta i tid och otid, och framstå som absurt sentimentala och nostalgiska, fast det egentligen är nåt demensrelaterat som håller på bryter ut.
posted by   Mattias
Jag tycker det låter ganska hälsosamt egentligen, få utlopp för år av bristen av gråt. Det tar väl en tid innan man hamnar rätt igen.
posted by   Jan L.
Exempel: En treårig flicka hittas en kilometer från sitt hem, klockan tre på natten, av en förbipasserande. Hon har vaknat på natten och klätt på sig sina vinterkläder själv och letar efter sin mamma, som är på krogen.
posted by   Philip
jag gråter nästan av att läsa det här.
posted by   monica
Jag borde försöka lista allt som gör mig gråtmild, för att se ifall jag kan finna något mönster.
posted by   Mattias
Jag grät till The Abyss filmen, i slutet.. Det blev ett sci-fi gråt... öh!?
posted by   Jan L.
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The sum of 9 and 3
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